Everyone talks about the seven year itch. There seems to be an unwritten rule that when you're in a long term relationship, it loses some pizzazz after a while. But does it have to be that way? While it's true that settling down, having a family and taking on responsibilities might sometimes get in the way of spontaneity, your relationship only has to lose its oomph if you let it. With a little effort on your part, you can keep your partner interested forever and give the lie to those long term blues.

Don't Reveal The Past
This process starts at the beginning of your relationship. When you meet someone new, there's a real temptation to share everything from your clothes size to the number of previous partners you have had. This is a no-no, especially the last one. That's because it's hard to forget numbers and you'd better believe that at some crucial moment when you've been together for years, those numbers will come back to haunt you. What seems like delightful wildness when you're in the dating stages will suddenly appear to be dangerous levels of promiscuity - don't say you weren't warned.

Maintain Some Mystery
Hand in hand with this, keep some of that mysterious allure. When you first meet your partner you don't know everything - and that's part of the attraction. Keep a part of you for you and you will always have that air of mystery. Your partner will want to know more - and that's the way to maintain interest. Let's face it, who but you needs to know what it takes to get your face on in the morning? Keep those techniques to yourself to maintain a healthy allure.

Share
At the same time, you can't keep everything to yourself or you will shut your partner out - the kiss of death in any relationship. If you wake up one day and realize that you haven't talked properly for weeks, and then do something about it. And this is not about organizing day to day activities like who will pick up the kids or shopping for your next dinner party. This is about quality time for you to share thoughts and feelings and regain that sense of intimacy you had when you first met.

Plan A Getaway
One way to ensure that you have that time is to plan a romantic getaway. Book some babysitters and arrange a staycation somewhere fabulous if you don't want to go far, or splash out on a longer trip and leave the kids with their grandparents. Every couple needs some time to be just the two people who met and fell in love and you won't get that unless you're on your own together. You would be amazed at how much a weekend away can enhance your relationship - and your sex life. Speaking of which...

Spice up the Bedroom
As a new couple you probably explored all the ways to please each other, but with additional responsibility - and the consciousness of little ears around - your sex life may have become more functional. That's another big mistake, but it's one you can fix. Add some interest by dressing up (some new lingerie for her, a fireman's outfit for him, perhaps), buying a few toys (you know what kind) or combining with food. The rest is up to your imagination, but there's no limit to what you can come up with.

Work On Romance
It's not all about sex, though, so don't forget to address the romantic aspects of your relationship. Some couples find that a regular date night keeps things fresh. Even if you're staying in to watch a movie, you can always set a romantic atmosphere with some candles and some wine while you curl up on your Catnapper couch. Don't leave romance to chance and your relationship will be all the better for it. Seriously, even if you don't want to go the candles route, you can still foster romance with the tip that comes next.

Do Something Unexpected
Surprises are always good (except for the one in a million who hates them) and they don't have to be huge. Send a card, buy flowers or chocolates, organize a golf date - it's up to you. Just do something that tells your partner: 'I thought of you today.' Manage that and you will banish that seven year itch and ensure that your relationship has plenty of pizzazz.

Article by Guest Feature Writer Dee A. Mason


What do you do to spice up your relationship? We want to know!

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Would you date someone who had previously dated one of your friends?

Yes! I'm perfectly happy to date my friend's exes. They're exes for a reason.

No! It's too incestuous. I don't feel comfortable dating a friend's ex.

Maybe Yes: I haven't had the opportunity, but I don't see a problem with it.

Maybe No: I haven't done it, but I don't think I would.