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Younger man for marriage!
I have recently got divorced and am enjoying my freedom. I recently met a male colleague at work who is showing a great deal of interest in me. He is 11 years younger, but thinks age is a number and we have gone out a few times. To be honest, I have had a great time and haven't laughed so much in years! A week ago, he proposed marriage as he says he has fallen in love and does not want to lose me to another man. It was quite a shock for two reasons; I had thought of him as a friend (he is 44 after all, while I am 55) and second, we work at the same company. I have to give him an answer soon and am totally confused and in a way angry. as I feel he has turned my life upside down. Again, I like him a lot and need his friendship. What should I do?
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rate me
He is 44 not 24 so consider yourself lucky you found a mature romantic with a job and courage. It is hard to accept something that has all the attributes of something perfect, because we as humanbeings always seem to be waiting for the bottom to fall out.
If he is sane, employeed, and madly in love with you then what is the problem. SAY YES!
Posted by:
sashamercy
on 02/25/2010
rate me
Your frustration is quite justified. When you feel that everything is working fine, suddenly the world turns upside down. We so hate to moved or shifted or shaken from our comfort zone.
But you know what...it is only you who knows exactly what to do? You have the answer to your own dilemma. I will make it clear to you in these following points:-
1. Age difference is your key issue. Well, it hardly matters if you are truly wishing to marry this man. As long as you'll both are on the same wavelength...age cannot be the deciding factor.
"Years dont make sages, they make only old men".
2. The most important decision you need to make here is whether you truly love this man or that you genuinely value his friendship more.
3. If its purely a friendship from your side, then dont pressurize yourself into the institution of marriage.
4. But if you see him as a good companion and partner, someone with whom you can share your forthcoming years till the end then dont sideline his proposal only on the account of he being younger to you.
5. Another point which you havent written is about any of you having kids. In case either of you or both of you have kids, you'll need to sought that out first.The feeling of insecurity should not get cultivated in the minds of children if the two of you decide to come together.
6. Society is important and the thought about what will others say is really scary. But at the end of the day when you are depressed and lonely, the society and its people dont come to rescue you from the dark hole...its you who has to handle it all by yourself.
So get up and be confident. Take a decision coz its only you who knows the answer to this.
It will all be fine!!
Posted by:
Madeline
on 02/19/2010
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