Asked

Jan 19 2010

Female

My girlfriend & I have been together for 4 years. There are ups and downs, we have normal arguments every month usually when she's having her PMS and when I forgot what I have said :P.
She's complaining to be bored everyday and get upset whenever seeing me, even I don't do anything wrong. I'm an optimist, she's more towards the pessimist type.
We love each other sincerely but need cure for our boring relationship. We're giving ourselves a break for couple weeks to really understand our feelings. Frankly, I'm really confuse and need help on what I should do. :(

anonymous post in On a Break

Answered

Apr 21 2010

All relationships go through their ups and downs and ins and outs. All you really need to do is try new things as a couple. Go volunteer at your local animal shelter or soup kitchen together. Seeing others who don’t have as much as you will give both of you a new perspective on life and your relationship. Learn things together. Take dance classes or a pottery class or even a jewelry making class. This way you can learn something new about a hobby and each other.

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Answered

Jan 19 2010

Hi Anonymous :-)

It sounds like you are both just feeling a little restless together. Four years is a good long time to be together, and I'm sure you are both very good friends.

Make sure that you are both spending time with other friends, and are actively involved in things that you each like to do; both apart and as a couple. Making time to have a date night, where you go and do different things, or just even cooking a meal together can be fun. Make a list of the things that you both enjoy doing, and then pick one each week to either share with each other, or go and do for yourselves.

Maybe finding some new interests that you can both enjoy would be a good way to jump-start some new energy into the relationship. Couples need to keep learning new things, about each other, and themselves, and keep exploring new ways to have fun together to keep intimacy alive, and keep away boredom.

If you're stumped for ideas, try using the Internet and searching 'ideas for couples' ~ you should get enough stuff to at least spark your interest.

Remember to schedule time apart too, absence really does have a way of making you fonder for one another's company, as well as bringing out the things you can appreciate about your partner.

Good luck and have some fun together! :-)

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