Asked

Oct 5 2009

Female

I'm engaged to a guy who seems to be perfect. Everyone tells me he is! And I even think he is most of the time. But he has a couple of habits that really bug me. He clears his throat in a very loud and annoying way. It sounds like a small thing but it really gets on my nerves. Also, he is very particular about food. I grew up in a family where we tried new things and like a little variety. My guy would probably eat hamburgers and fries every night if he could. He is afraid of trying anything new because it might be spicy. Now, at 34, I may not be able to have my perfect man, but can I hope that we will find happiness together if I am so bothered by these things?

anonymous post in Engaged

Answered

Feb 25 2010

These are superficial and habit based issues and not personality. These things can change over time with manipulation or you can just come clean and tell him about them. Should he have to change these things? No, just like you dont have to change the things that Im sure drive him crazy.

No matter who you are with, after time little things just get to us. But if your heart is still in it, and you know you love the person then get an ipod and put in those earbuds during the throat clearing.

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Answered

Dec 9 2009

I heard once that the things you love about someone in the beginning, such as a foreign accent or a unique laugh, end up annoying you the most as time goes on. Maybe this will have the opposite effect. As you fall more in love with him, these annoying habits will fade into the background of your blissful love connection. Or not. Do consider that nobody is perfect. If these habits are the worst he has to offer, consider yourself lucky. Buy him some cough drops and stock up on hamburger helper.

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Answered

Oct 28 2009

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Answered

Oct 6 2009

A couple of bad habits versus almost perfect in every other way? Honey, I think the majority of the female population would consider you a very lucky girl. Unless of course if you dont love the guy. Then it would be a whole different problem. But if you do love him, then you should probably tell him about the things that are bothering you. Try and work it out. Dont let little little things cast a shadow over happiness.

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I need some advice. Been married for a few years (2nd time for her - 1st for me) I accepted her kids and her life before me -and we created a life together. I have caught her in lies, and she has cheated on me. I love her with all my heart, and my reaction often is - i am leaving. I don't think i want to leave - but i don't know what else to do? Our styles of parenting often clash (they are teena... read more