Asked

Nov 27 2009

Female

My girl of 4 months has invited me to have Christmas with her family. I love her for sure and I know we've got something good going on but Christmas with the family just smells like trouble, having to be so polite and friendly and know that they're all checking me out wondering if I'm good enough...I ain't up for it! But can't say no to her either....

by halo in Committed

Answered

Apr 13 2010

Why would you have a problem meeting the family? It's Christmas and that's what families do, they get together. If you have a trouble with being polite that sounds like trouble to me! You should be polite anyways and of course they're going to check you out because they don't know you. If you have a problem with it just say so. Better that then for you to go and end up acting foul, ruining everyone's time.

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Answered

Dec 22 2009

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Answered

Nov 29 2009

I would just do it. I am sure it would mean alot to her. If you do not go she is going to think you are not into her.

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Answered

Nov 28 2009

Hey Halo (video game or Christmas reference?),

I understand why you'd be anxious, and rightfully so. All you have to do is talk to her. Tell her you're feeling anxious about being around her family for an entire evening and that puts too much stress and pressure on you. Make sure she knows how much this is troubling you so she can grasp the gravity of the situation. She will be disappointed, but understand and respect your wishes.

If you want to work out some sort of middle ground, ask her if you can just come over after dinner. Being at the table is more of an intimate setting (a.k.a. no elbows on the table, eat with your mouth closed, and questions you will feel uncomfortable about answering). So, you don't have to be there the whole time, just one or two hours after dinner, when everyone's full and is too bloated to care to ask you anything psychologically or emotionally deeper than "What's your favorite color?"

I encourage the compromise, because then you both get what you want.

~ Anthony

[reply to answer]

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