Divorce--How Sweet.
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Asked
Dec 14 2009
Female
My sister's boyfriend kisses me on the mouth every time he says goodbye to me, which I find strange. My sister and I are quite close, but I'm worried about upsetting her. Her and her boyfriend have just bought a house together. How do I approach this?
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Answered
Dec 14 2009
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Rimshottbob
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Rating: 3.2/5 | 34 votes
This could go two ways, but either way it's something you will have to broach at some point, if only to stop something that you are clearly not comfortable with.
The first course of action might be to deliberately not let him kiss you on the mouth the next time you see him. As you go to say goodbye, kiss him on the cheek before he can get to you(!) - or make light of the situation if you see him going in for a kiss on the lips - push him away with a "uh, uh, mister!" and a smile.
Most importantly, if you are close to your sister (as you mention) and are worried about this, you must talk to her about it. Again, make light of it by turning it into an idiosyncrasy - try opening with a jokey "your boyfriend has some weird habits..." and go from there. It doesn't have to be a problem.
Of course, if there is something amiss in their relationship, and he does actually like you, then it's something that your sister will have to deal with. But it's best to approach your sister about it now, to make sure there's no sense of you and her boyfriend doing something behind her back.
Once you've told your sister your conscience will be clear, and if your sister suspects this may be a symptom of deeper problems, then she can investigate that for herself in her own way.
But essentially, raise the issue, keep it light-hearted and get it dealt with. It's probably just a miscommunication or a cheeky attitude that's the cause of it all!
The first course of action might be to deliberately not let him kiss you on the mouth the next time you see him. As you go to say goodbye, kiss him on the cheek before he can get to you(!) - or make light of the situation if you see him going in for a kiss on the lips - push him away with a "uh, uh, mister!" and a smile.
Most importantly, if you are close to your sister (as you mention) and are worried about this, you must talk to her about it. Again, make light of it by turning it into an idiosyncrasy - try opening with a jokey "your boyfriend has some weird habits..." and go from there. It doesn't have to be a problem.
Of course, if there is something amiss in their relationship, and he does actually like you, then it's something that your sister will have to deal with. But it's best to approach your sister about it now, to make sure there's no sense of you and her boyfriend doing something behind her back.
Once you've told your sister your conscience will be clear, and if your sister suspects this may be a symptom of deeper problems, then she can investigate that for herself in her own way.
But essentially, raise the issue, keep it light-hearted and get it dealt with. It's probably just a miscommunication or a cheeky attitude that's the cause of it all!
[reply to answer]
I need some advice. Been married for a few years (2nd time for her - 1st for me) I accepted her kids and her life before me -and we created a life together. I have caught her in lies, and she has cheated on me. I love her with all my heart, and my reaction often is - i am leaving. I don't think i want to leave - but i don't know what else to do? Our styles of parenting often clash (they are teena... read more
This relationship is bust. You need trust as the foundation. Get out.
She lies to you....why are you questioning yourself? She's not worthy.
Stick it out. Try to work on things. Pursue counseling.
I feel sorry for the kids. They are the victims, here.
