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It is hard to walk away from a relationship, especially a relationship that you've put some much time, effort and love into. What's more, no one wants to feel like a quitter. No one wants to walk away from a loved one to spend the rest of his or her life asking, "What if I would have stayed a little longer and kept trying." I am here to tell you that, in many situations, walking away is the best thing to do. In fact, if you are at the point of walking away, doing so may benefit all involved. Here are five reasons why.
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You Both Need a BreakLike a sport, a relationship can be very exhausting and take a lot of skill and concentration. The rigor of constantly taking each other's feelings and circumstances into consideration, while simultaneously dealing with our own lives, can, indeed, fatigue us and cause us to lose a bit of focus. So, like an athlete in a sporting event, a couple may need to take a break to recuperate, rejuvenate and reassess the game plan. Perhaps a break could be the half-time in the Super Bowl of love (sorry, I couldn't help it). You must remember something very important: you are not competing against your partner, but with your partner.
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Mental TurmoilTrying to stay in a partnership that is not working, especially when one is trying to force a relationship to work, can be painful for several reasons. This struggle takes its toll on us, from our performance at work, to our sleep patterns, to our ability to focus, and to our ability to show love and affection to others. The pain of having a committed relationship fizzle is debilitating enough, but trying to resuscitate a dying partnership may do serious harm to one's psychological self. If you are in such a bad relationship that the other aspects of your life are suffering, you may need to think about the benefits of keeping such a relationship going.
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Break the Manacles of EmbarrassmentDo not, I repeat, Do not stay in a relationship because you don't want to be embarrassed in front of friends and family. Anyone who would laugh at you and talk behind your back about your misfortune is not a real friend and not a person you want to be around. Real friends and family want you to be happy, and if eventual happiness means ending an engagement or marriage, they will accept that. If they do not, consider walking away from those relationships, as well.
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Cut LossesThe relationship is already pretty bad. You cannot go two days without a big fight, all romance is gone, and you're starting to avoid each other. Why would you stay in this relationship to make things get worse? Do you really want to walk in a see her with another guy on the couch? Do you really want to find him flirting with some floozy online at 3:00a.m.? Cut your losses. End it before one of you becomes homicidal.
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Time Apart is GoodWho knows, maybe the time apart would be good. Absence can make the heart grow fonder. Perhaps a break would help each party realize what he or she had in the other. Maybe a break will make each person realize that something "actually, someone" is missing and needs to be regained. Sometimes time and space is the perfect remedy for an ailing relationship.
Either way, walk away. You will be happier in the long run.
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Apr 2 2010
by Lemonaide
Making the decision to walk away from a relationship takes time. Allow yourself the privilege to feel the emotions. Discuss how you feel with a trusted friend or doctor. Then, and only then, make a firm decision to end the relationship without looking back. Walk away.
Tell-tale signs of the need to end a relationship include alcohol or drug abuse, suspected gambling, known or suspected thievery, any form of violence, including a violent temper, loudness of speech, and the repetitive feeling of having to apologize to your friends and family about the conduct of your boyfriend/girlfriend.
The reasons many choose to end a relationship are varied and diverse. The objective of dating is a courtship ritual, designed to lead you up the ladder to a successful relationship. There are many factors to consider, including background, religion, core beliefs, goals, dreams, as well as interests.
If everything on your private checklist is great except for one factor--analyze the factor that makes you want to apply the brakes. Both sexes have a tendency to hide their greatest shortcomings during the courtship, because they want to appear to be balanced, righteous individuals, worthy of being loved. What is it, precisely, that makes you hesitate to take the relationship to the next level?
Make a list of pros and cons. Then, subtract from that list qualities or traits that you are able to overlook. This task should give you a better idea of the qualities or traits in which you believe are a hindrance.
For example, when you make a list of vegetables you like and do not like, is okra on your "fave" list or "hate" list? Do you believe that, one day, you will be able to eat a vegetable you hate without feeling nauseous? Apply this principle to your relationship.
Even when you love someone so much that it hurts to think of being without them, whose life will benefit the most? Yours or theirs?
Trust your gut instincts. They will never lie.
Tell-tale signs of the need to end a relationship include alcohol or drug abuse, suspected gambling, known or suspected thievery, any form of violence, including a violent temper, loudness of speech, and the repetitive feeling of having to apologize to your friends and family about the conduct of your boyfriend/girlfriend.
The reasons many choose to end a relationship are varied and diverse. The objective of dating is a courtship ritual, designed to lead you up the ladder to a successful relationship. There are many factors to consider, including background, religion, core beliefs, goals, dreams, as well as interests.
If everything on your private checklist is great except for one factor--analyze the factor that makes you want to apply the brakes. Both sexes have a tendency to hide their greatest shortcomings during the courtship, because they want to appear to be balanced, righteous individuals, worthy of being loved. What is it, precisely, that makes you hesitate to take the relationship to the next level?
Make a list of pros and cons. Then, subtract from that list qualities or traits that you are able to overlook. This task should give you a better idea of the qualities or traits in which you believe are a hindrance.
For example, when you make a list of vegetables you like and do not like, is okra on your "fave" list or "hate" list? Do you believe that, one day, you will be able to eat a vegetable you hate without feeling nauseous? Apply this principle to your relationship.
Even when you love someone so much that it hurts to think of being without them, whose life will benefit the most? Yours or theirs?
Trust your gut instincts. They will never lie.
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